Sunday, October 19, 2014

Developing Patience

I was recently called to serve in the Young Women organization, and I am thrilled! Today, I am teaching them a lesson on patience.

Last Sunday I was given my topic.  Ever since then my week has gone something like this:

{driving in the car} "Why is this driver going so SLOW?  Aargh! Wait; I'm supposed to be practicing patience this week. OK, I will try really hard to not be annoyed that this driver is GOING SO SLOW!  Take a deep breath..."

Repeat twenty times.

{after asking one of my children to do a task} "It has been, like, 30 seconds!  Why is this kid not jumping up to do what I asked?  I'm supposed to practice patience...how long do I have to wait before I get really annoyed that they aren't doing what I asked?"

Repeat twenty times.

There were many, many scenarios like this one.  I am learning that developing patience takes time.



I feel like I was born with a lot of qualities that come fairly easily to me: optimism, determination, faith, love.  Patience is not in that list.  I could have a LONG road ahead of me. . . .

So, I am looking for some tips and pointers from all of you.  What are ways that you have been able to develop this characteristic in your life?  Come on, help a girl out. . . pretty please (right now!).  :-)

12 comments:

  1. One thing that's helped me is to take a breath, step back, and look at things with an eternal perspective. Viewing things in context of the big picture helps me have patience with others AND myself, and helps me see what's important and what really doesn't matter. Easier said than done, but when I take time to do it, it's a big help.

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    1. Great one! This reminded me that sometimes Jeff will say, "Will this matter in five years?" :-)

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  2. Hmm....I think everyone struggles with patience from time to time. As with most gospel principles, I think it helps to understand reasons/purposes rather than to just grit our teeth and try and make it happen. I think patience is tied closely with turning or wills over to The Lord. When we understand that his ways are not our ways and trust that he knows what's best, it is easier to wait on The Lord. Likewise, I think it helps us to develop the humility to allow that other people don't share our perspective or daily agenda and exercise a little more patience and understanding with them.

    With those things in mind, practice will strengthen our patience muscles.

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  3. I always thought I was a pretty patient person, but when Jason was hurt maybe I wasn't because I get to work on it now almost every day! But I have learned to think of the reason behind whatever is testing my patience. With Jason it's just because. I know he doesn't do things to irritate me, but is a result of what happened to him. With the kids, it's because they are kids and playing legos with their brother is more important than putting away their lunch plate after the third time asking. The other thing I think about is that everyone has their own timetable, just like Heavenly Father. I might want the trash taken out now but he'll get to it when he gets to it and it doesn't matter how many times I "remind" him.

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    1. Thanks, Jennifer! Patience really is a relationship tool, isn't it?

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  4. I read something today that had to do with prayer, and the guy (H. Burke Peterson, I believe) said that when you pray for something, you should also pray for understanding. That way, if your prayer isn’t answered right away then at least you might be granted the understanding as to why. Maybe not specifics, but at least some peace.

    I think this can apply to general patience as well. I have tried to seek to understand people, and that helps me be patient with them. I also try to remember that how I respond to them can affect how they feel, and I know I want to spread joy, not stress. And I try to remember that my impatience does nothing to speed the process- it is entirely unproductive and just makes me more irritable while I’m waiting. So, for example, if I get stuck behind a really slow driver I think to myself, “Wow, this guy’s slow. I wonder if he has recently been in a car accident and now he’s really nervous about driving. That would be rough. I’ll just hang back aways so I don’t stress him out by being all up on his bumper. That’ll keep the other cars back too and give him some space. After all, I’m just going to a church activity. People are late for church activities all the time and nobody bats an eyelash. Hey, now I have time to admire the pretty scenery.”

    Of course, it’s not always like that. But I try. :-)

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  5. I struggle with patience, too, but (unlike you, because you're perfect and fabulous and I want to be you when I grow up) I've learned that most of the time, the situation that is "causing" my impatience is one I created myself. If I'd hopped in the shower earlier, I wouldn't have been rushed to get out the door. If I'd left the house five minutes earlier to let the kiddo climb into the carseat on her own, I wouldn't have spent eight minutes fighting her to get in the carseat. Etc. Patience is a constant struggle, but it's a lot better if I build room into my life for life to actually happen. :)

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  6. Patience isn't something that comes naturally to many of us like me but the older I get the more patience I seem to have

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  7. Millie is right - put everything against the backdrop of eternity. What will it matter in the long run? Also...impatience is really, at it's root, an arrogance. Impatience says, I'm entitled to have things go according to my agenda, and they're not. Well, who are we to determine how things are going to run? Only God has control of circumstances. We are one small piece.

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